The SWEETEST little toes...
that
CHANGED
MY
LIFE!!!
(I can't get enough of them!!!!!)
Having a typical child
changes you.
But it's much different
than the change
that happens when
you have a child with
a disability.
Family members and friends
who knew you before the
birth of your child with a disability
will comment on how you have changed.
And when you think about it,
you know they are right.
How could you not change?
Your expectations change.
The vision of your
child's future changes.
You begin the journey
of acceptance.
You have to adjust to
your new "normal".
You start celebrating,
and I mean REALLY celebrating
milestones that people
with typical kids take for granted.
You don't give up on your dreams
for your child but your
dreams definitely change.
You try not to compare your child
with typical kids but sometimes
it's so in-your-face
that it's hard not to.
And then you realize
that it has to stop.
It's not fair to your child
and it's not fair to you.
You continue the journey
of acceptance.
Accepting your child
just as they are.
You begin to see
the BEAUTY in them
more than ever before.
Their joy.
Their unconditional love.
Their perseverance.
Their determination.
You start to notice
the things they CAN do
instead of focusing on what
they haven't mastered yet.
You change.
You become a research fanatic,
equipping yourself to be the
best advocate possible
for your child.
Medical terms and
educational terms you
had never heard before
the change become
everyday words to you.
When you see another parent
of a differently abled child
you feel drawn to them
when you once would have
walked right past without
even noticing them.
You use words like
"differently abled" instead of
"special needs" or
"mentally handicapped".
The word "retarded"
makes the hair on the
back of your neck stand up.
Even though you try not
to let it bother you.
Even though you used
the word yourself
before the change.
Even though people have
labeled you "too sensitive"
about it.
You can't help it.
You change.
And as you become
aware of people
who are prejudiced
against your child
you also become aware
of your own prejudices
against others.
Your own closed
mindedness comes
to light.
You don't want
to stay that way.
You soften.
You change.
Some of your old friends
accept the change.
Some don't.
They distance themselves.
Maybe they don't
know what to say.
Maybe they just can't
handle it all.
Whatever the reason,
they are no longer around.
You make new friends.
Friends who get it.
Friends who become like family.
Friends who become your lifeline.
Me?
Yes.
I have changed.
I'm probably a
little less flippant,
a little more serious.
I find joy in the
simple things and
beauty in places I
would have never
bothered to look
before the change.
I avoid words like
"tolerance"
and embrace words like
"acceptance".
I am committed
to judge less and
forgive more.
This sweet girl
changed my life.
...And I feel SO LUCKY because of just that.
